I realized how I am not used to living step by step with the Holy Spirit, it actually takes effort to listen to Him and follows His guidance, which we are so often used to just shutting out Holy Spirit's nudging. I have been reading Pastor Shyju Matthews's blog and when i chance upon the post about guarding your heart, it was so timely for me. Since the washing of feet incident on monday night, I found it difficult to help my family and myself keep up with the buidling of our family altar. My mum and sisters still watch drama online and ignore me when i question them about their bible reading. I thought we agreed we are going to put God first? If He is first, shouldn't praying and worshipping Him take priority? Loving God is not a weekly affair, we need to continue to seek Him to realized that He wasn't ever away, we were the ones that strayed.
I was upset and very discouraged, what will it take for them to wake up? I wanted to shout and cry and get really pissed. They were too 'busy' and 'tired' to care about God. Why does He have to take the sideline again? But Holy Spirit really helped me to guard my heart, He told me not to show my temper or have bad feelings towards the whole situation because it will not help. And i remembered Pastor Shyju's sharing during ICIC, 'The greater your destiny, the greater your battle, sometimes God allow them to fight you so you can multiply'. My family are still blinded and I should not let satan to use this against me. Instead hold still to God's promises and continue to pray and worship Him! He showed me that He is working! Even among all these, I prayed with my youngest sister the night before and she was so touched and encouraged and last night even when other olders ones ignored me, YR was very willing to read the bible with me! We read and mediated on Luke chapter 1 together and shared with each other what we received from the Lord. Praise the Lord! I really learnt even from YR, she has such amazing insights for someone so young and I learnt from listening to her sharing too! From little baby John to YR, God showed me again that He can use children and even babies! The Holy Spirit can be upon them because they are ever willing and do not reject God! He showed me again to keep pushing forth the idea of CHOP to my church and family and possibly the nation. I am amazed and thankful to Holy Spirit's guidance! Do not look at what seems to be not happening but look at what God is already doing in my house! Starting from the youngest YR, I'm sure God's Power and love will spread to the whole family!